to blog or not to blog?(or, what was the question again?)
When I arrived home today, both children were naked. My dear mother- in - law had been with them while I was away for a while. As my mother-in-law exited, they began crying and pulling at my clothes. I, too, was naked within seconds, so I knew I had to move fast. I had to get them down for naps. My two year old threw herself on the floor, thrashed about, crying for nap nap. My three year old son dashed around the living room, destroying all in his path - the carpet was encrusted with playdough and every drawer in the house was opened and emptied. I immediately went into what I have recently identified as extreme OVER STIMULATION. I truly feel that my nerve endings are overloaded and my body sinks into a kind of strange black hole.
This does sound dramatic and now that I am writing about it, I can laugh a little ( a tiny chuckle). Anyway, I did manage to get them settled into sweep naps, sit down for my lunch - which is a rare treat for me, and something I am trying to do every day. After lunch I realized, "Wow! I am alone and I can nap, read, drink more coffee... blog". I resist blogging and I know why. My every cell is engaged in this life of being with my babies. I am fortunate that I can stay home with them; although, there are days when I would love to leave the house and go to a JOB. So, often when I do have any free time at all, I find that I don't want to think about my children, write about them or talk about them. I need a healthy dose of distance.
But, right now writing feels good. It is giving me perspective - certainly something to laugh about... ( I am hearing the voice of my youngest, waking up from her nap). I will end by throwing out two issues regarding my three year old son. He is very smart and wants to know everything. He asks questions all day long!!!! All day!!!! "Mommy, why do hydrangeas look like all the other flowers?" "Mommy, why are Fire Ants called Fire Ants?" "Mommy, why do people have hair in their noses?" All of this is true - nothing made up for entertainment - I don't have the energy for that! It really is an amazing job here. The hardest I have ever had. I am tired. I am happy. I am easily overstimulated. I often don't know the answers, and I often forget the question.